This summer, my family and I decided to do a home exchange for our vacation. This means that for two weeks, we lived in the house of some family we’d never met, and they lived in ours. Half of the people I tell this to ask me a series of questions, often beginning with: Did they sleep in your bed? (Yes.) On your linens? (Yes.) Did they steal anything? (No.) But surely they broke something? (Not really.)
If you are in this group, then you might be too squeamish for house swapping. As the many websites dedicated to the practice will tell you, this is a cheap, convenient, and popular way to travel. But it is also a form of willing identity theft. For two weeks, this family drove our car, rode our bikes, and cooked in our kitchen. Their daughters played with my daughter’s dolls, and their sons wore my son’s pirate costumes. For all I know the mom wore my clothes every day. That part was not in our informal agreement, but given the weird imposter feel of the arrangement, it could have been tempting.
I got the idea from my brother-in-law. He had signed up first, and one night he was at our house on the site checking on who had responded to him. This lead-up phase works much the same way as with online dating sites. You post a picture of your house and wait to see who bites. You can also initiate contact with people you’re interested in. I urged him to be aspirational and only contact people who lived in chateaus. Yes, this is just like contacting potential mates who are too good looking or otherwise out of your league. But, just as with dating, I convinced him that they had some flaw that would cancel out the family crest. In this case, it was shaky English. Owners of chateaus offered access to “musculation” rooms (exercise rooms) and nearby “equitation” (horse-back riding). One promised décor that was “castle-typical.” Ha ha, I thought. Such French inbreds would be lucky to stay in my 1940s Wardman.
The next day we signed up ourselves, and noticed another parallel to dating sites: The route to signing up involves encouraging fantasy. We took pictures of our house, which we described as a “large light filled house” in the “heart of Washington.” We took advantage of the European crush on Obama by adding “15 minutes from the White House,” hoping to prompt visions of Obama running past our front door every morning, or Bo wandering into the yard. My husband milked this beautifully: “One of the most striking things about our neighborhood these days is that it is jammed with Obama people,” he wrote. “Many of his staffers and advisers live near us.” We did not mention that they escape in the summer to avoid the killer humidity and the mosquitoes.
We got bites from Italy, Spain, France, California, Canada, New England. We imagined ourselves biking around Tuscany, sight-seeing in Madrid. Ultimately, reality set in. Nibbles turned into e-mail exchanges where we and our potential partners sussed each other out. City or country? How many beds? How many kids? How big is your car? Do the bikes have flat tires? Wi-Fi or no? We haggled over details and dates and finally settled with, not noblemen, but our French socioeconomic equivalent—a nice, middle-class family from Brittany, with four kids, and plenty of toys, bikes, and bedrooms. That’s one more kid than we have, but I figured French children are famous for being docile and proto-adult, so they wouldn’t do too much damage.
Writing in the New York Times recently about her summer rentals in Cape Cod, novelist Jumpa Lahiri describes inspecting the kitchens: “the stale McCormick spices, the speckled enamel stockpots in which countless visitors have boiled their corn.” I have rented a couple of beach houses and recognize the sensation. The standard décor—the framed lighthouses, the wooden birds, the scented honey—is supposed to provide some light architecture for your imagination without filling in too many details, like a stage set for a not yet written play. On our beach vacations, the children run around pretending to be lost mariners, while we chat about beach houses we’d like to own some day.
Hanna Rosin Double X co- editor, reporter, prefer my friends live.
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Comments
It's me again, and I already
By: abshandra | Sat, 12/05/2009 - 17:16
It's me again, and I already doing home exchange, and I really not enjoying it. The home I exchange is not comfortable at all. Also, the environment is not good for my kids. So, I think if you want to do home exchange, think it carefully. Penisvergrößerung, will be good for adult.
Marble Tile
By: parkerbarker | Wed, 12/02/2009 - 17:49
We tried this as well. I packed all my clothes away as the thought of someone wearing them was too much for me. I have marble tile on my kitchen counters and should have left instructions not to use a harsh cleanser on it. Unfortunately, it got pretty scratched up when the guests used a scrubbing pad to clean up.
Is that really fun doing home
By: abshandra | Wed, 11/25/2009 - 19:16
Is that really fun doing home exchange? I must try it to. I will contact my sister-in-law for an exchange. I want to feel like what you feel. You make me curious. Wait for my news, okay? - restaurantes madrid
Hanna, I have also did a
By: nikone | Sun, 11/15/2009 - 12:49
Hanna, I have also did a house exchange while I was away on vacation,her persons name was Matilda, from Barcelona. I must say it was a wonderful experience, it went smoothly! I was a little concerned though with leaving a stranger in my apartment so I think next time I go on vacation I would rather find a vacation rental from those guys. I think its cheaper then staying at a hotel, you don't have to give up your house to a stranger, yet the palce you rent is usually someone else's house and they always have kitchens/kitchenettes in them as well.
mnbv
By: mnbv | Fri, 11/13/2009 - 05:28
I think nowadays while going for house exchange we should take extreme care.
flooring
Hanna, this a great article
By: shin | Thu, 09/10/2009 - 00:13
Hanna, this a great article and I enjoyed it thoroughly, thank you 4 sharing.
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Sounds fun.
By: Hahaue | Wed, 08/26/2009 - 05:10
I think I might put my house up for exchange when we get our renos done.
Vancouver Island, close to the seawalk and harbour, mountain views... Split-level home, master bedroom is on the lower level with its own wood-burning fireplace and uber comfy kingsize bed, also 42" LCD TV and Xbox 360. Full bathroom, computer room, laundry room (brand spanking new steam washer and dryer), storage, and sauna. Upstairs has a big living room with a fireplace, 62" DLP TV (which may become a 50" Plasma shortly, still debating), Xbox 360, PS3, Wii, DVD player. Dining room with sliding door to deck, kitchen has all new appliances (we love Samsung, you'd swear one of us worked for them or something, everything we own is Samsung) and opens on to another deck in the backyard with stairs that go down. Huuuge backyard, too. Full bathroom, 2 guest bedrooms, one with a kingsize bed, one with a queensize futon. All new windows (they're everywhere, lots of light), new flooring throughout (in progress), furnace with central air conditioning, newly fixed plumbing, new toilets and tub/shower (in progress), and new paint. Garden is as of yet non-existent, but would you stay here?
I'm proud of my home, but we're young (23) and have 3 cats who we couldn't just shuttle off somewhere. Our dogs can be taken elsewhere for watching, but the cats wouldn't respond kindly to that. Do people generally leave their cats for people to care for? They're all strong, healthy boys who would just need to have their food and water filled every day. They spend most days lounging in the yard or on the deck, so I don't think they're high maintenance at all. What do you think?
I'd love to give this system
By: csorenson | Tue, 08/25/2009 - 08:05
I'd love to give this system a try!
Although i'd feel a little bit uncomfortable knowing that someone is using my clothes!
Thanks for the article.
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hoteles en pinamar
Planning your Exchange - Timing
By: tallecks | Thu, 08/20/2009 - 12:30
My wife and I seldom made friends abroad when we stayed in hotels. Now that we
do home exchange, we make new friends on nearly every trip. It's a very real benefit of being in a more residential environment.
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For those who are interested in trying this out, it is worth knowing the seasonality of the planning process. For summer exchanges, there is a big peak in planning activity right after Christmas break. Many of the most attractive properties are locked up by mid-February. There is another big peak in May and June. This is more of a last minute rush, when people who haven't found an exchange yet will make or take proposals that they wouldn't have considered earlier in the year. If you want to do an exchange over Christmas, people often start planning when the summer vacations end.
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There are many exchanges available in Paris in August. Anyone with personal experience of this season in Paris? Does the city still "shut down" in August when so many take their vacation?
Great read!
By: LadyR | Tue, 08/18/2009 - 15:03
I want to test the house swap market after reading this article, sounds like a great adventure for better or worse!