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This week a momentous shift took place in tabloid America. Kate Gosselin, who has always teetered between loathsome and annoyingly familiar, wormed her way into the hearts of the viewing public. Gosselin was the maternal half of the TLC reality show about life with sextuplets and twins—Jon and Kate Plus 8—until the tabloids, with their infinite reach, reported that Jon was possibly sleeping with a third-grade teacher. Then on the Today show Monday, Kate put the nail in the cheating bastard’s coffin. Jon, she reported, withdrew $230,000 out of the $231,000 in their joint bank account. “I have a stack of bills to pay in my purse,” she agonized. She used that detail—in my purse—to great effect, for what American woman these days does not walk around hiding a stack of unpaid bills in her purse?
View DoubleX's slideshow of the spectacular fall of Jon Gosselin.
As their marriage falls apart, Jon was probably destined to lose the public relations battle. In celebrity divorce cases, as in regular divorce, we are still conditioned to view the man as holding all the cards. If the woman behaves in a reckless, crazy manner—think Denise Richards, Christie Brinkley, or Tricia Walsh of You Tube rant fame—we assume it’s to make up for her frustration and helplessness. But in this case the gender stereotypes are blinding us to the obvious reality. In this miserable duo, Jon is what divorce attorneys would call the “out” spouse—the one with no money or power who might end up on the street. And like many out spouses, he is looking out for the interests of the kids. For those reasons he is actually the one who deserves our sympathy.
Let’s consider his withdrawal of that money. The divorce attorneys I surveyed agreed that, in general, it is not a good idea to raid an account after you’ve agreed in arbitration that you won’t. And Kate did her best to portray this as a pattern of irresponsible behavior, alluding on the Today show to Jon’s “erratic purchases.” But there is one exception wherein the behavior is perfectly rational. “If you are the ‘out’ spouse who does not make money and has no means of support, then absolutely you can withdraw it,” says Gary Silverman, a prominent Nevada divorce attorney who is representing Gov. Jon Gibbons, undergoing his own tawdry divorce. “You have to protect yourself from the other half who wants to squeeze you out.” Usually that’s the wife but “sometimes the person in the role of the wife is not actually the wife,” says Silverman. In other words, Jon is, for arbitration purposes, the wife.
On the Today show, Kate claimed that she “can’t pay the bills,” needs money to buy the kids food, and is afraid for the roof over their heads. “I did the show to provide them with a better life,” she said. “Never did I think I’d be back in the same position, worried about how to provide for them.” She dabbed her eyes after she said this. But the couple has earned $50,000 to $75,000 an episode for a show that went into five seasons, not to mention the freebies, which surely include some leftover granola bars and Gap T-shirts. Early this year Kate relentlessly toured the country for her sticky-sweet, quasi-spiritual parenting books. Last week, TLC announced that they would rebrand the show Kate Plus 8, leaving Jon, yes, out on the street and Kate with a fat wallet.
Hanna Rosin Double X co- editor, reporter, prefer my friends live.
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