When word broke that Barack Obama is pausing his busy schedule of revamping health care and heeding climate science and not intervening in the electoral process of a sovereign nation in order to spend three hours preaching "responsible fatherhood"—why, I nearly did a jig. The celebrity-stuffed event in the East Room sheds light on a little-reported obsession of the president whose own father abandoned him when he was barely 2 years old.

And, if the White House release is any evidence, this will be no From Gs to Gents tomfoolery; rather, Obama will make a substantive policy speech and then take questions from regular Joes just trying to parent in an age of Twilight, sexting, and a global recession.

No doubt the address will hit on the troubling statistics for fatherless households and the need for dads to behave—but what I would really hope to see is acknowledgement of all the women in these households doing double duty, who also should get a special tip of the cap on Father's Day.

Obama, who was of course raised by a single, working mother, hasn't invited any women to the East Room chat, but seemed to get the importance of shouting-out in his speech in Chicago last Father's Day:

We need fathers to realize that responsibility does not end at conception. We need them to realize that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child—it's the courage to raise one. We need to help all the mothers out there who are raising these kids by themselves; the mothers who drop them off at school, go to work, pick up them up in the afternoon, work another shift, get dinner, make lunches, pay the bills, fix the house, and all the other things it takes both parents to do. So many of these women are doing a heroic job, but they need support. They need another parent. Their children need another parent. That's what keeps their foundation strong. It's what keeps the foundation of our country strong.

I was fortunate enough to be raised in a two-parent household (woo Dad); but it's always worth remembering that there are women fathers, too! Is there an appropriate way to honor them this weekend?

Tags: Barack Obama, father's day, mothers, working families

Dayo, I disagree that mothers—even single mothers—should be honored on Father’s Day. Moms just got their shout-out a month ago; do they really need another one? Yes, some women serve double duty as both mother and father, and surely their kids should give them extra love on Sunday. But if we systematically turn Father’s Day into yet another celebration of all of the child-rearing and housekeeping that female heads of household take care of, I worry that will inadvertently suggest that there isn’t enough child-rearing and housekeeping to celebrate among dads. To borrow a sentiment from an essay that hardly needs another link since it got so much damn attention the first time, perhaps the way to mold the man you want is to “reward behavior [you] like and ignore behavior [you] don't. After all, you don't get a sea lion to balance a ball on the end of its nose by nagging.” Father’s Day is a great chance to reward the men who do their share of bringing up baby. Let’s not ruin it by giving them their praise with a wink, then turning the conversation back to the “real” parents.

Anyway, mothers aren’t the only single parents out there doing double-duty. And no one’s suggesting we should do something special on mother’s day for widowers or custodial fathers who are raising their kids alone.

Tags: mothers