Greetings, gentle readers. I'm Nick Olsen, interior decorator and former 'Deal Hunter' on the dearly departed Domino magazine website. (Full disclosure: EIC Deborah Needleman, wife of Slate's Jacob Weisberg, gave me the gig and let me call a "fugly" spade a spade. Grateful!) I'm here to write about my Dream House, the irony being that I rent a rat-trap tenement apartment in downtown Manhattan—La Leopolda with a fire escape. Then of course there's this giant bummer of recession and housing crisis and now 'swine flu' and OH MY GOD HOW I CAN EVEN BEGIN TO THINK ABOUT DECORATING?! Well, it's still my day job, where I regularly encounter closets the size of my bedroom and tables worth more than my life.

But don't gag just yet: this blog will be about style, not aspiration. I've seen gorgeous apartments in Bushwick and hideous ones on Park Avenue, and I could care less about fetishistic, design-y junk (who really wants a bedazzled skull teapot anyway?) or trends in the luxury market. I just like pretty rooms and pretty stuff! And if I can't afford what I want, I'll make or fake it myself. So that's my Dream House in a nutshell: decorating inspiration, deals, DIY chutzpah, and deep thoughts. If you think something is tired or fugly or just think I'm a total charlatan, please say so in the comments! I won't be offended.

Time for some pretty pictures? If you have a dream or a house or both I suggest making a bulletin board of everything you love at the moment, just like a real-deal decorator/fashion designer/creative type! Even in the post-scrapbooking Flickr era there is no substitute for a hysterical New York Post clipping tacked next to a swatch of beloved, discontinued fabric. The challenge, of course, is translating it all to your pad, but that's where I come in. Click here for a gallery of some of my favorites, beginning with our office board at Miles Redd, pictured at right (a group effort) and ending with an image from Todd Selby. I'll leave you with a link to Albert Hadley's fantastic bulletin board (he's the Triscuit-serving, chain-smoking, utterly awesome dean of American decorators). Here's to living large on the small!

Tags: Bulletin Boards, Deborah Needleman, Domino, style

I believe it was Maria von Trapp who said, "Let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start." As a thrifty decorator (one who would totally make playsuits out of old curtains), I think said beginning has to be the classic Parsons table. According to Mitchell Owens' NYTimes Q&A, we can credit French luxe-modernist master Jean-Michel Frank with its design, a uniformly square or rectangular table with top and legs of the same thickness, named for the French outpost of the Parsons School of Design where it was conceived. However some crafty janitor whipped up the first concrete example right here at Parsons New York—victory for the style proletariat!—and the rest is history. Forgive the cliched comparison but it's the little black dress of decorating.

Why it works: at any height or function (cocktail, side, game, dining, console...) the table's pure geometry either acts as a foil for antique or sculptural pieces in its midst or else blends in with more austere surroundings. Plus, consider the frame as a blank canvas, ready for any decoration (paint, paper, veneer, etc.) to suit every style/color palette. The Parsons is in fact a very good place to start for any room. But where to turn when even late-midcentury versions by Paul Evans and Karl Springer sell for megabucks?

Anywhere you look, really. West Elm is the clear winner here: their expandable dining table ($549) boasts hardwood contstruction and a robust lacquer finish ... I've assembled one -- its leaf mechanism has the pleasing, weighty thud-click of a Cadillac door. And their two-drawer desk is now so ubiquitous it deserves a place in MoMA's permanent collection. CB2 also gets the proportions right with the Runway console (on sale for $199; I covered two-thirds of mine with grasscloth, leaving the espresso veneer to show underneath). Room & Board will do the customizing for you but I'm not sure I like how the contrast top breaks up the line. What would J-MF say?? Finally, Ikea wins (as usual) in the "practically free" category: when was the last time you bought dinner for $12.99, much less a side table (pictured at right)? Love that.

Now back to art class. Toxic VOC's be-danged, oil-based high gloss paint is your best friend when it comes to plastic Parsons furniture. Sand lightly and one coat looks like lacquer! Marbleized and woven papers also make these babies sing but require a bit more crafting skill. I say channel that janitor and get creative! Okay, I want to end with a "parsimonious" pun but it's only my second post ... I'll summon the J-M-Frankian restraint.

Tags: Design, DIY, furniture, little black dress, Parsons tables

I believe it was Maria von Trapp who said, "Let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start." As a thrifty decorator (one who would totally make playsuits out of old curtains), I think said beginning has to be the classic Parsons table. According to Mitchell Owens' NYTimes Q&A, we can credit French luxe-modernist master Jean-Michel Frank with its design, a uniformly square or rectangular table with top and legs of the same thickness, named for the French outpost of the Parsons School of Design where it was conceived. However some crafty janitor whipped up the first concrete example right here at Parsons New York—victory for the style proletariat!—and the rest is history. Forgive the cliched comparison but it's the little black dress of decorating.

Why it works: at any height or function (cocktail, side, game, dining, console...) the table's pure geometry either acts as a foil for antique or sculptural pieces in its midst or else blends in with more austere surroundings. Plus, consider the frame as a blank canvas, ready for any decoration (paint, paper, veneer, etc.) to suit every style/color palette. The Parsons is in fact a very good place to start for any room. But where to turn when even late-midcentury versions by Paul Evans and Karl Springer sell for megabucks?

Anywhere you look, really. West Elm is the clear winner here: their expandable dining table ($549) boasts hardwood contstruction and a robust lacquer finish ... I've assembled one -- its leaf mechanism has the pleasing, weighty thud-click of a Cadillac door. And their two-drawer desk is now so ubiquitous it deserves a place in MoMA's permanent collection. CB2 also gets the proportions right with the Runway console (on sale for $199; I covered two-thirds of mine with grasscloth, leaving the espresso veneer to show underneath). Room & Board will do the customizing for you but I'm not sure I like how the contrast top breaks up the line. What would J-MF say?? Finally, Ikea wins (as usual) in the "practically free" category: when was the last time you bought dinner for $12.99, much less a side table (pictured at right)? Love that.

Now back to art class. Toxic VOC's be-danged, oil-based high gloss paint is your best friend when it comes to plastic Parsons furniture. Sand lightly and one coat looks like lacquer! Marbleized and woven papers also make these babies sing but require a bit more crafting skill. I say channel that janitor and get creative! Okay, I want to end with a "parsimonious" pun but it's only my second post ... I'll summon the J-M-Frankian restraint.

Tags: Design, DIY, furniture, little black dress, Parsons tables

I've learned a lot from my decorator boss, heretofore referred to affectionately as Mugatu on my other blogs, but the man could write an entire book on mirrors. He does love a reflective surface (that's his bathroom)—for sparkle, for glamour, for contrast with rougher textures. And one of his pet peeves on the topic actually makes for a great decorating lesson: Never hang mirrors on the horizontal. I know it sounds like one of those arbitrary, potato/po-tah-to personal preferences, but I've conducted tests in every kind of room, with every style and size of mirror, and it always seems to ring true. Take a gander at this five-panel beveled mirror from Williams-Sonoma Home—it has a nice scale and is well-priced at $295. But somehow on the horizontal it looks low and stumpy and downright...homely. No, it's not just the wooden ducky. Hanging an oblong mirror (whether rectangular, oval, Baroque and swirly) brings the eye down and flattens the wall and the space. It's also more of a 20th century notion (think of the endless horizontal lines in Frank Lloyd Wright's work, or the Bauhaus school), and I'm more of a classicist, but I maintain that unless the expanse of mirror extends wall-to-wall like at Balthazar, you're better off going vertical, even if you have 8-foot ceilings. Bring the eye up! Fill the space on either side with framed drawings or small paintings. Still not convinced? I'll break out the scare tactics: Horizontal mirrors will make you look fat!

Tags: accessories, decorating tips, mirrors, Williams-Sonoma Home

Ah, the blogosphere: hate the word, love the benefits. I was recently introduced to a fresh and charming blog, A Bloomsbury Life (author Lisa is sort of Vita Sackville-West meets Cameron Diaz), which led me to discover an insanely addictive website, www.colorhunter.com. Do we recall my favorite feature from the late, great Domino, "Can this Outfit Be Turned into a Room?" Similar concept: if you have a photo of said outfit, or of a favorite painting or magazine cover or room, then you're well on your way to that room with Color Hunter.

All it takes is uploading your shot et voila, five of the most dominant (and usually pretty saturated) colors appear on the screen. Check out Lisa's results with a lovely Ruthie Sommers room from Domino at right. Such chicness! Totally reminds me of Lance and Harry's fabulous, tiny studio from Apartment Therapy. (Guilty admission: I tried three different images of my old apartment and all the schemes were HIDEOUS. Like, I was living inside a bottle of Chartreuse or something.)

Okay, I know not everyone will paint their hallway charcoal and add a melon-y shade (though I highly recommend it!), so let's analyze the Sommers-inspired palette and try to make a stylish living room with only these colors and by varying textures. I would paint the walls the buttery off-white (flat, maybe lightened a bit) with the lighter grey on trim (high gloss), or the reverse as in L&H's apartment. I actually like the unexpected contrast of the warm beige next to colder neutrals so I could see a sofa in this shade of cotton duck, piped in the dark charcoal or vermilion red. That's the safe route. Another option would be a bright red cotton sofa with a warmer wooden frame (a la L&H) and rich charcoal satin pillows for texture contrast, on a beige jute area rug sitting atop a wood floor painted deep grey or black. Either way a red lacquer coffee table would look terrific.

Whew, see how one could while away the hours? I'll get to my beef with Color Hunter: just what do those numbers refer to? First I thought Pantone, but no. It's maddening. In a perfect world the site would spit out Benjamin Moore (or, heck, Home Depot brand) colors with a link to purchase, available for pickup at a local store. Am I missing something? If not I fear the site's a bit like the much-hyped Wolfram Alpha search, completely remarkable but frustratingly limited.

Image is a screenshot courtesy of A Bloomsbury Life.

Tags: A Bloomsbury Life, color palettes, colorhunter.com, Domino, fantasy rooms, Ruthie Sommers, Wolfram Alpha

On most warm weekends in New York City, the closest I get to a picnic is a sidewalk table at Cafe Gitane, but for Memorial Day I'm heading to Los Angeles and CANNOT wait for some quality outdoor eating and drinking. (The last time I visited this particular friend on a patriotic holiday—Fourth of July five years back—I ended up on a sailboat in Marina del Ray with Valerie Harper, a.k.a. Rhoda Morgenstern. Expectations are understandably high.)

Some general questions: Picnics only require baskets and maybe a cooler, but who among us will attempt to grill this weekend? Is a "barbecue" different from a "cookout"? I know the former connotes meat, but what does one cook outdoors besides burgers and hot dogs, even of the veggie and tofu variety? Not a big carnivore here (red meat takes two weeks to digest, they say) but I'm positively OBSESSED with the design of a classic Weber Grill (at right), $10 off the list price at $69.99. Just screams cul-de-sacs and above-ground swimming pools, right? For coolers I love this Cheney-grade icebox in rigid aluminum ($149.99). The folks I'm visiting actually bought a similar truck box to use as a coffee table which I think is a great idea!

Other classic outdoor eating accessories include this gingham round tablecloth from Lillian Vernon for $12.99 (which apparently hasn't gone bankrupt YET, thank goodness), splurge-worthy matching napkins from Williams-Sonoma ($20 for a set of four but c'mon, they're "green"!) and an L.L. Bean insulated tote ($49.95) if there's no room left in the Prius for an ice chest. This red tartan picnic blanket with carrying case is pretty charming, and if I wind up at the Hollywood Bowl, a stadium seat that looks like T. Anthony luggage could come in handy. But back to meat. So far this forged barbecue set from Target has the simplest, sturdiest design I've found. Still searching for that perfect "S'MORES ARE MY HEROIN" apron ...

Have a good one, folks!

Tags: barbecues, cookouts, grills, long weekends, memorial day weekend, picnics, provisions

Greetings from L.A., a town that REALLY enflames the car and gadget-envy. My traveling companion just bought an iPhone, and we're putting all the applications to great use, especially for mapping "coffee" and "Cher's house" and "Ed Hardy Outlet" (kidding on that last one). It's an endless source of amusement:

"Do you have an app for passive aggression?"

"I want to invent one called 'Tap that App.'"

Anyhoo, a friend saw my post from last week on ColorHunter.com, which will churn out a readymade color palette inspired by any photo. Feeling my pain about the mysterious numbers next to every shade (savvy readers informed me that they're for web designers, not decorators), she e-mails to say that Apple (via The New York Times) has come my rescue with Color Capture Ben, a new app that lets you zoom in on a photo in your phone, match that particular color to a number in Benjamin Moore's deck ("Malibu Mudslide," anyone?), and also shows you a range of other shades on the lighter and darker sides. GENIUS!! Free in any Apple store after June 1, CCB will also help map the nearest BenMoore vendor locations, just like I requested!

Except I don't have an iPhone. [Insert "California Dreamin'"/ "Dream House" joke here.]

Tags: Color Capture Ben, color palettes, fantasy rooms, iPhone

According to Wikipedia, the purpose of a box-spring, that rigid, hollow-sounding polyester-covered wood thing under your mattress, is threefold:

• to help raise the mattress's height, making it easier to get in and out of bed;
• to help absorb shock and reduce wear to the mattress; and,
• to help create a perfectly flat and firm structure for the mattress to lie upon.

Right now I'll testify to the first: even though I'm not elderly or infirm, after having slept on an Ikea Malm bed for three years I'm loving the lack of bend-and-hoist with my current harvard frame + b-s + mattress setup. As for point #3, I think the Malm or any other simple platform could firmly and evenly support the mattress, no? My real query lies in #2. How many folks out there have lugged a prematurely aged Sealy ("Lohanpedic 5000") out to the streetcorner muttering "doggone this worn out piece; I shoulda used that box-spring all along" ?? Have there been studies on the subject? Even Consumer Reports doesn't recommend ditching the box-spring to save money.

Futon mattresses are another story. Ikea makes their own, special-Swedish-size version for each bed (explains why I hurt my mincing fingers every week making up the Malm with a standard spring mattress), but I've never been comfortable on those gushy things. So I want to know: who out there ditches the undercarriage and sleeps on a traditional mattress on a platform bed? Does anyone really miss the box-spring? This is not craven comment-whoring ... I've wondered about it for years!

Aesthetically I'm split. I love the low-slung, box-free BoConcept look just as much as the traditional height headboard-only or four-poster variety. But one thing I can't abide is the exposed box-spring -- major decorating faux pas! Traditionalists among us have a ton of inexpensive bedskirts (a.k.a. "dust skirts" or "dust drops") to choose from but I know people who'd rather sleep on the bare floor than decorate with anything called "skirt." For the Venn Diagram overlap representing Modernists and Box-spring Aficionados West Elm offers this linen cover (above) for $59-$99, depending on size. It's tailored and neutral and almost disappears. Sure, some beds have upholstered siderails for the same purpose, and decorators will often have professionals cover the springs to match a headboard or curtains ... but on my budget? I just spent four nights on a friend's Aerobed in L.A. to save $$ for margaritas and I. AM. PROUD.

Tags: bed skirts, box-spring, design dilemmas, matresses, platform beds, West Elm

From the e-mailbag:

Hi Nick,

I'm a fan of your blog, er, both your blogs, er, all of your many blogs, and I have a question. I know Q&A isn't your usual style, but perhaps you're just missing a good question.

I am on the hunt for a hot small scale sofa for under $1000. I'd like something a little more formal, so I'm thinking exposed legs. Most of what I have found is of the Ikea or West Elm varieties and what I want is something of the gorgeous variety. Any suggestions?

Thanks!

Katherine C.

PS. Yes, in case you're wondering, [blog name redacted] has two posts devoted to this topic, but all of the sofas are unavailable anymore, fug, or futon-esque fug. Plus, I trust your taste more.

Flattery may not get you a Mitchell Gold + Bob Williams sofa, but it sure works on me! To paraphrase my response: I actually really like the very moderne Ikea sofabed ... too bad the color choices are limited and boring/fug. Plus I might collapse if forced to spend $900 on any one item there. The West Elm convertible is just too chunky-dumpy—I can totally see through to the foam cushions. Not cute. I like Katherine's direction of going armless and leggy like the Mitchell + Bob "Rennie," a simple 50s shape that lends itself to less-than-ideal room arrangements (corners etc.), but the price is NOT just right with those two bears. Hopeless?

Not at Room & Board. I immediately thought of their Kinsey shape: a close match available in 75 and 84 inch lengths at $999 and $1099, respectively. That's at the top of Katherine's price range but I've only heard raves on R&B's quality. Can't say the same for the other two chains. Plus they'll let you customize with 250 fabrics to choose from (the standard colors are too grey-ed out for moi), and the style is so simple I could see investing in a slipcover with a skirt to de-formalize the look. Maybe a light color with contrast piping to switch out for summer?

Kath, waddya think?

Tags: design dilemmas, Ikea, Q&A, Room & Board, sofas, West Elm

If the eyes are the windows to the soul, then windows are the eyes of your apartment/house/travel trailer. And like your peepers, they need protection. So why are there a zillion pairs of cool, $10 sunglasses and, like, ZERO stylish options for inexpensive blinds? I'll keep moaning about that in a second but first let me address a terminology pet peeve: the expression "window treatments" just makes me cringe! Ditto that for "drapes" and "draperies"—way too 1950s housewife. So can we all vow to stick to "curtains," "blinds" and/or "shades"? THANK YOU.

Back to windows on a budget. I look through every catalog from Ballard Design to Z Gallerie and haven't found anything more basic and stylish than the speckled bamboo blind. Like a Parsons table, they work in every room and with every style. Why? I think it's mostly the natural fiber factor. Metal blinds just scream "Motel 6" (if horizontal) or "beach condo" (the vertical variety). Same for those gauzy accordion shades, which I'm pretty sure are made of polyester or some other fire hazard. Bamboo, like a sisal or seagrass carpet underfoot, adds texture and contrast to painted surfaces (like wood trim or metal windows) and tends to disappear. The blinds look great on their own or under fancier curtain panels.

Caveats? Woven bamboo isn't so stellar at blocking light, but Smith + Noble will fabric-back their flat-fold variety and add a decorative trim ... for additonal dollars, natch. Also the operating mechanism on Pearl River's selection has a Sir Isaac Newton quality, but I have a pair in my bedroom and so far the gravity-n-string combo hasn't failed me. And PR offers a humongous 6-by-7 foot blind for only $52.50 (pictured). Honestly, how can you beat that?

Tags: bamboo blinds, never gets old, Pearl River Mart, Smith + Noble, windows