Sanford vs. Spitzer

How about a poll, XXers. Which worse: Your husband turns out to be Client Number 9, Eliot Spitzer's code name in the prostitution scandal; or your husband, Governor Mark Sanford, writes erotic e-mails to his dear Argentinian friend, Maria, such as this:

I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night’s light—but hey, that would be going into sexual details.

As Stephen Sondheim wrote so many years ago, "Maria. I just kissed a girl named Maria."

Place your vote in the comments section below.

Tags: Eliot Spitzer, mark sanford

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Emily Yoffe is Slate's Dear Prudence and Human Guinea Pig (emilyyoffe@hotmail.com)

Comments

I'd take Spitzer, easy.

By: cityrat | Fri, 06/26/2009 - 12:31

I'd rather have my guy pay the occasional hooker than fall madly in love and lust with another woman–and have to endure the public airing of his adoration for her various bits–any day, though obviously neither would be super fun. People are acting like Spitzer was having sex and Sanford was playing chess. I don't see much difference–they're both "cheating", just one of them seems really into it.

As far as this:

"First: as far as we know, Sanford had safe sex with his South American sweetie."

hUH?
you must be kidding.

Sanford

By: Cider | Fri, 06/26/2009 - 11:40

I would rather my husband cheated with a woman he respected and with whom he had a friendship.

in the long run

By: thjodhild | Fri, 06/26/2009 - 08:37

Leaving aside (with relief) anything related to their husbands per se, it's going to be much easier to be Jenny Sanford than Silda Spitzer for many years to come. Sanford has only boys to raise, while Spitzer's children are all girls.

Tough call.

By: sugar_k | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 17:04

I have complicated feelings about Eliot Spitzer. Prostitution to me is a lot more disgusting than a plain old affair, and when I think about the whole Client Number 9 situation I want to vomit, literally. On the other hand, I could never be married to a right-wing kook like Sanford. So for the tie-breaker I'll go with geography: Silda gets to live in Manhattan, while Jenny is stuck in South Carolina. Spitzer wins.

McGreevey: where is he now?

By: Samantha Henig | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 15:53

aistagg & jerseygirl -- Newsweek ran a "closure" column on McGreevey a couple months ago:

http://www.newsweek.com/id/191420

drowning vs. burning?

By: jerseygirl | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 15:22

This reminds me of the sort of conversation we seemed to have a lot in fifth grade -- "would you rather drown or burn to death? Would you rather eat worms or ants?" Ummm -- neither?
But if we are playing this game -- I don't think any humiliation could be worse than having your husband pronounce his love for another woman, while his "passionate" emails make the rounds of the web. So I'll take (gag) Spitzer.
And thanks to the earlier poster who reminded us of Jim McGreevey! Did you all know that he's studying to become an Episcopal priest?

sanford, in spite of the cheessyness

By: caro.alvarez | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 15:17

...totally agree w/daney. prostitution is just too much. i'd rather discover I've been married to a coward and cheesy cheater falling in love w/someone else than to a creep-female-user w/ no self-sex control.

thanks CorkPopper

By: Starling | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 15:03

Maybe I'll make this my new dating mantra: "I'll take a sincere fuckup over a smarmy creep any day."

Jim McGreevey

By: aistagg | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 14:45

I'll take the former NJ governor over the other two.

Sanford, I guess

By: CorkPopper | Thu, 06/25/2009 - 14:38

I'm not sure the marriage could be put back together, but at least Sanford seems HUMAN. He fell in love, he acted irrationally, he was selfish, but he is clearly in pain and understands how incredibly screwed he now is. Spitzer, on the other hand, just seems like a creep. Of course, the posters who say his creepiness is less a threat to his marriage than Sanford's infidelity are right--but if you ask me who I'd rather be married to, I'll take a sincere fuckup over a smarmy creep any day.

And Samantha, have you never gotten a passionate letter before? It's wise to put them on paper instead of a screen, but only a hopeless cynic would think a love letter from someone who loves you is a bad thing.