Looking for Submissions: How Marriage Changes You
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In our "Your Comeback" blog today, Emma Gilbey Keller writes about Allison Yarrow's decision to change her name when she got married—something Keller never thought she'd do. She's looking for more submissions from women whose relationships have inspired life changes: Did you convert as part of a commitment? Did you move across the country or to another continent? Emma wants to hear from you at emma@thecomebackbook.com.
Personally, my only strong feelings about my maiden name are that it should not be hyphenated. I would never force my future offspring to have Grose tacked in front of my future husband's name. That's just cruel.
Photograph of a "Just Married" sign by Getty Images.
Jessica Grose is the managing editor of Double X and the co-author of Love, Mom: Poignant, Goofy, Brilliant Messages from Home. Click here to follow her on Twitter.
Comments
In my marriage I had to give
By: danna | Thu, 10/08/2009 - 15:25
In my marriage I had to give up a part of myself, that's a sacrifice I had to do to keep a good relationship with my partner. He did the same too... I miss that part sometimes and I think that if you give too much in a marriage after a while you start to ask back. Marriage changed me but it didn't change me too much, this formula kept me away from marriage problems.
maybe it's too soon, but...
By: Cinnamongirl | Sat, 08/01/2009 - 10:43
Marriage hasn't changed me. I've only been married three weeks, but we were living common-law before that since 2004. The only difference that I can tell is we wear rings now, and there's no confusion when we refer to "my husband" and "my wife".
Marriage Ain't For Sissies
By: Raebae | Sat, 08/01/2009 - 07:54
I posted in my blog just last week about how I went from being a big sissy before marriage to less of one now.
http://rebeccaclayhaynes.blogspot.com/2009/07/marriage-aint-for-sissies....
Perhaps it's "cheating" since I'm not married yet...
By: LK | Sat, 08/01/2009 - 04:49
....but my fiancée and I have a unique plan to keep our relationship as equal as possible. We're BOTH changing our last names. Now, in this case, we have a built-in option; he was adopted and we both love his "original" name. His parents aren't overly thrilled, but we really believe in equality and partnership in all things and this just seemed like the best way to go! Besides, I'm not overly married (pun certainly intended) to my own last name, and hyphenating would sound TERRIBLE. So, double-changing it is!
looking for "submission"?
By: Jewellya | Fri, 07/31/2009 - 15:11
Yes, I've submitted to the name change. First it was the fights about not changing it at all, which was a stalemate until we discovered the problem of my husband convincing officals that he's my husband. then i thought about having four names a la Elizabeth Taylor...turns out my States' drivers licensing system doesn't allow for it. they are pretty adament that you either run the name together (DeLaRosa), use your maiden as your middle name, or hyphenate. My middle name is more significant to me than my last, so I wasn't dropping it. But trust me, hyphenating complicates matters severely, especially when the names don't sound that great when stated together. So after about a year of awkward hyphenating and my daughter was born, I finally "submitted" to the whole business and dropped my maiden name altogether.