Have You Gone From Being Pro-Choice to Pro-Life?

One last thought

By: phpeter | Wed, 05/20/2009 - 12:44

I thought about this question yesterday and had to add a comment. I think one of the profound issues with our society (and thus with abortion) is that people lack the want to take responsibility for their actions. I understand that pregnancies can be unintended occurances, but they are not typically suprises or accidents. Yes, birth control is available but not as widely as it should be (even the morning after pill), but what about self control? Since when do we get to act with no regard for the outcome? If I drink and drive, then kill somebody it is not called an accident but rather a consequence that could have been forseen based on the preceeding events, should sex and the resulting pregnancy not be an understood outcome?

I guess what I am saying is that it is unreasonable to expect to click your heels three times and have consequences reversed, life does not and should not work like that. Pregnancies from abuse, rape etc are abhorent, but such a small, small number that it should not be a point of arguement. My final point is that I think "Choice" should be a standard applied strongly at the beginning of the process, the choice to have sex or how to protect oneself, for starters. That is a point of emphasis that should be pushed by strong women more than how to "fix" the resulting "problem".

the heartbeat

By: mags | Wed, 05/20/2009 - 08:31

When I went with a friend who had a scan at 8 weeks and could see the baby and hear his heartbeat - technology that wasnt available to those of us who have been pro-choice since the 70s - then it all changed. I struggle with why, with technology now having given us such insight into how swiftly a fetus develops, the discussion about abortion doesnt try encourage a focus on its occurrence happening, if it must, as early as possible

More pro choice than ever

By: ponymom | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 16:56

Having been pregnant and given birth, having seen friends go through pregnancy and birth - some with nightmare stories to tell - I am more pro choice than ever.

I can't imagine forcing a woman to go through the risks against her will.

And if we live in a society that tells women they *can't* abort, we risk living in a society that tells women they *must* abort.

It's as unacceptable to compell a woman to abort as it is to force gestation and childbirth upon her.

My view

By: Nora2005 | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 16:50

As most of the young people bound to be pro choice, so was I.

In fact so pro choice, that I chose to terminate pregnancy because I was in college and did not want to drop out. It was an inconvenient event. I felt no remorse, at the time, because they taught you everywhere, including planned parenthood where I had the procedure done, that fetus at less than 10 weeks is just a shapeless piece of meat. I was 19 years old. And I had no idea. I do remember that the first impulse on hearing I was pregnant was an electric shock of pure joy. I was happy for the few minutes and then "reality of my predicament" set in.

In retrospect I wish that someone EDUCATED my stupid, selfish, ignorant ass about reality of what an act of hate abortion really was. That is stamped out life.

I have been pregnant only three times in my life. The first I aborted, the second I lost at 5 month gestation, which was so hugely painful to me that I do not want to expound on it. I was 34 at the time. The last pregnancy, at 41, resulted in my precious son, who is now 4 years old.

I am pro life. I will not protest abortion clinics, I will not call doctors and women who participate in the process any kind of a vile name to their faces. But even now, 26 years later, I do remember the joy I felt when I found out I was carrying life for the first time and I grieve deeply that I was not strong enough to hold on to that joy and bring it to term.

And this is what life experience does...

Some of each, please.

By: sharongracepjs | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 16:38

I was raised staunchly, passionately, doubtlessly pro-life. As I entered the world, however, I realized how the pro-life movement, for all its conviction, can be a cold bully. And then I realized how the pro-choice movement, for all its open-minded freedom, can be cruel and unsupportive.

At this point, I am disheartened by the zealots on BOTH sides of the issue, as they are all prone lose sight of the human predicament involved in their self-righteous mania to win the debate. In such a charged and tangled controversy, I can accept neither side's black-and-white position, and so I am reluctant to identify myself with either. I guess I am an antiabortion pro-choicer - that goes along nicely for a retrograde feminist and lapsed born-again Catholic!

Still Pro-choice

By: Richmonder | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 15:51

I am, and will always be, pro-choice. However, I truly believe that choice means exactly that--the CHOICE to terminate a pregnancy, keep a child, or put a child up for adoption.

What is missing is the other side of the argument: birth control and making responsible sexual decisions. Women and girls need to know how to protect themselves, not only from pregnancy, but also from disease. In addition, young girls should receive help building self-esteem so that they don't feel the need to have unprotected sex (or sex at all until they are ready). And no, abstinence-only education IS NOT WORKING. Give girls the information they need to protect themselves and the power to say no if they are not ready.

Let's look at all sides of this issue with the intent of keeping abortion safe, legal, and rare.

In the middle

By: calimom | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 15:42

I was raised in a really fundamentalist, pro-life church. I saw graphic images of aborted fetuses at an early age, and it definitely made an impression on me. I was very pro-life until my twenties, then pro-choice with some reservations. I think abortion in the first trimester should be legal, but I'm really uncomfortable with late-term abortion. There's a huge difference, developmentally, between a zygote and a thirty-six-week fetus.

I don't think the issue is as black-and-white as the people on either extreme would like to believe. Not all women have the emotional or financial resources to raise a child. I'm a college-educated, middle-class woman who very much wanted my child, and yet I am sometimes completely overwhelmed by the challenges of parenting. To the hard-core prolifers, what would you say to a woman who gets pregnant by an abusive partner? Having his child will tie her to him for life. What about children who get pregnant after being raped? (Like the recent case in Brazil.) Do we really want eleven-year-olds carrying babies to term? No good can come of that.

Adoption is no picnic either; birth mothers feel great pain and loss, as do many adoptees.

I would like for there to be fewer abortions. I think the ultimate answer is more birth control, education, and support for single mothers.

pro life now

By: phpeter | Tue, 05/19/2009 - 12:28

My wife is 21 weeks pregnant and at 12 weeks we had an ultrasound (which is not something we had for our 3 year old daughter as it was not common practice) that is used to determine risk for Down Symdrome. At 12 weeks, to be able to see the head outline, bridge and bulb of the nose, arms, hands with etc. was a real eye opening experience. I have showed these images to others who have remarked that they had no idea how developed the child was at that time. The knowledge that at that early stage (first trimester), your cluster of cells is now an actual developing human and not some vague mass is remarkible information that has no doubt changed my opinion about abortion. By taking the vague idea of a fetus and adding a face to it, my whole opinion has changed about not only if it abortion is an acceptable choice, but when and how it should be done. I am now pro-life, but I am realistic enough to know that my opinion is not the final say on this matter, nor do I expect it to be. I find the discussion with other rational people on this issue the opportunity to help mold how our society deals with this unfortunate act.

I don't think anybody is proud of abortion, the name itself is aweful, but it is here to stay. What I hope is that we won't be blind to information that we have. We spend millons (maybe billions)on prenatal care and neonatal care because the life is important, but then discard it just the same...we need to find consistancy. If we fight to save the life of a child born at premature at 24 weeks, should we still allow people to abort a child of similar development? How is a life worth saving in one instance and not protecting another? These are serious questions? If a baby human is clearly seen and distiguishable at 12 weeks, should we still abort it or should we allow for that life to develop and allow society (through adoption or other means) step up to tend to its needs?

I get that women view this issue differently than me (as a man) and that it might be viewed as an afront on their body, but I don't see that. Our society has a host of laws in place that protect us from ourselves, protect us from treating our body certain ways (drug use for one) so this my body my choice is not a logical arguement to me. My point is that how do we be rational with our expectations of how abortions should be performed? Never is not realistic but neither is late term 3rd trimester.