XX Factor: the blog

Can I Trade a Wife for a Secretary?

Ha, Amanda, I don't think there will be a slew of takers for your Wonder Woman wife. Or rather for Dr. William Moulton Marston's. It sounds too much like the unsettling, self-abnegating arrangement at the center of A.S. Byatt's The Children's Book, not to mention Big Love. Myself, I've actually switched from making the I-want-a-wife joke to longing for a secretary—the old-fashioned kind who picks up the dry cleaning and buys birthday presents for my kids' friends (not for my own children; I haven't sunk that low). I also really like the idea Lisa Belkin flagged from this academic article, "Housework Is an Academic Issue." The authors suggest an employer-provided housework benefit: Money that you can spend on whatever part of taking care of your home that you don't want to do yourself. Of course, this could also just be called a raise. But I like the idea of bosses out there recognizing this as a real, felt need that's worth a serious response.

Tags: housework, Lisa Belkin

Emily Bazelon is a founding editor of Double X, and a writer and editor at Slate.

Comments

thanks for sharing the

By: megatza | Tue, 01/26/2010 - 10:01

thanks for sharing the Academe article. And i certainly need a personal assistant, and used to joke about needing a wife (as a straight woman). I can do all the cooking you want, but the cleaning not so much. My boyfriend actually commented once after I folded his laundry that he folds better than I do. Sad thing is, it's true... and while i'm good at reminding him what needs to get done (who he needs to call, what he needs to get at the store, etc) but awful at remembering for myself. If only the iphone/droid had a "wife" application. not an avatar girlfriend sort of thing, but one who DID all the cleaning!

I often think about how I

By: Alycat | Tue, 01/26/2010 - 09:26

I often think about how I would love to have a personal assistant, but I think my mental picture is actually a blend of secretary and maid. Some days, there is just not enough time to be successful in everything. What I couldn't do if I had an extra pair of hands to get my tax stuff together, pick up the dry-cleaning, sort my mail, pay the bills, fill out the mortgage paperwork, put a load of laundry in, FOLD the laundry and/or hang it up, take out the trash, clean the dishes, cook dinner, go get groceries, vacuum the cat fur off the couch, go to church, volunteer at the homeless shelter, go to the gym, write thank-you notes, return social favors with a dinner party... boy, I could concentrate on just having a successful career.

Maybe what I need is a Businesswoman Wife Intern.

Long tradition

By: Fitzpatrick | Tue, 01/26/2010 - 09:21

Like the household steward of ancient Rome, or the butler in Victorian England, or Kramer's intern on Seinfeld.

Secretary?

By: Taradactyl | Tue, 01/26/2010 - 07:51

What Bazelon is describing is what my grandmother called a "Girl Friday". The male equivalent is a "Man Friday", an idiom taken from the character Friday in Robinson Crusoe. Not a secretary, but a personal assistant.

Whats it got to do with

By: ChrisSnooper | Tue, 01/26/2010 - 05:45

Whats it got to do with employers?