When I wrote about the MTV reality show 16 and Pregnant and its spinoff Teen Mom earlier this year, I wondered whether the young women on that show had really considered what it meant to put their personal lives out there for consumption. These new moms are being treated as public figures during a vulnerable period of their lives, and nothing proves this more than this headline from TMZ today:"' Teen Mom' 911 Call - My Mom Hit Me in the Face." 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom star Farrah Abraham was portrayed as having a volatile relationship with her mother on both these shows, and now viewers know the extent of Farrah's domestic drama outside the confines of the program.

This isn't the first time TMZ has written about Farrah's domestic-violence incident. It reported on the incident back in January when Farrah's mom was initially arrested for choking her. Now TMZ has obtained the 911 call, a completely unnecessary move, in my mind, considering Farrah's meager level of fame. Just goes to show that once you open the box on notoriety—even if you put yourself out there to educate other teens about pregnancy—it's impossible to get your private life back.

Photograph of Farrah Abraham from 16 and Pregnant (c) 2009 MTV Productions.

Tags: 16 and pregnant, farrah abraham, teen mom

There are a few things people even start to say that are guaranteed to get under my skin within milliseconds. "You know, Avatar was pretty entertaining," "Say what you will, but Rush has a great drummer, " or "I've been studying tantric sex." But my shoulders really start to tense up when I hear, "I'm pro-choice, but ... ." What follows that "but" is 99 percent guaranteed to be egregiously sexist, a suggestion that huge numbers of women wait eight months and abort for the hell of it or that women prefer to have their uteruses vacuumed out instead of taking a pill or that you should feel ashamed—or at least act like it. And that's what I got off this guilt-tripping "I'm pro-choice, but ... " whine written by Mary Ann Sorrentino.

In this case, what follows the "but" is twofold: that a woman who has an abortion should take on the stance of a woman ashamed, and that to prove that she takes the right very seriously, she should have invasive sterilization surgery. Or, at least, one woman in particular, Angie Jackson, the woman who blogged and tweeted and YouTubed her RU-486 abortion to much media and anti-choice outcry. Sorrentino detects a whiff of uppitiness in this young woman, and she's ready to lay down some judgment.

For someone who lays claim to feminist history, Sorrentino sure is ready to engage in two of the most sexist tropes around in order to shame Angie for having an abortion and talking about it in public. She demands that Jackson get herself sterilized if she doesn't want any more children, which, of course, is the classic sexist idea (used to justify abortion bans, no less) that perfect strangers know better how to use a woman's reproductive system than she does. (I don't want children, so I suppose Sorrentino probably thinks I'm an ungrateful wretch because I don't immediately offer my stomach to be sliced open for sterilization.) And she shames Jackson for having ambition, holding her nose while suggesting that Angie might be angling for a book deal. Heaven forbid! Feminists didn't fight and bleed in order to give their daughters a world where we could do things men do without apology, such as write books about our experiences or get a fair wage for our work, right?

The irony here should not be lost on anyone who knows the history of the abortion-rights movement in this country. For all that Sorrentino wrings her hands about how the right to privacy incurs an obligation to hang your head and shut up about your experiences, the reality looks a lot more like, well, what Angie Jackson did. Which is to argue for the right to abortion through story-telling. Feminists took the secret of abortion out of the closet and spoke openly about theirs at consciousness-raising meetings or bombarded government meetings about abortion and demanded that women with direct experiences with abortion speak. Putting a face on the women who have abortions made it easier to realize what people forget nowadays, that it's your neighbors, your friends, your sister, your mom—and that if you've had one, you're not alone. Even Sorrentino cannot escape this history while shaming a woman for speaking out; she references stories of women's experiences with abortion while shaming a woman for speaking of her experience with abortion! And that's on top of publishing an article shaming another woman for wanting to publish a book.

Tags: feminist history, livetweeting abortion, privacy

In the New York Times, Iraq and Afghanistan veteran Roman Skaskiw explains why he won’t be watching The Hurt Locker, The Messenger, or any other celebrated take on our current quagmires: He fears for the integrity of his wartime memories. After a while, Skaskiw says, “you struggle to distinguish how you felt from how you are expected to feel. Often it feels easier to surrender to expectation.” It’s a lovely essay, too subtle to be summarized here, and deserving of the few moments it takes to read in full. This bit especially jumps out:

Although it puts me and many of my personal friends in a flattering light, I fear the narrative of the reluctant, well-intentioned soldier because, along with similar reverence for all things military, it seems a requisite for endless war. The misguided motives of empire hide behind the sympathetic portrayal of its servants…

I resent the thanks I occasionally get because it is given without knowing whether I commanded an infantry platoon or a desk, whether I’d been a good leader or a bad one, and I resent the pity because, all told, I’ve benefited from all the military has taught me. Occasionally, I’m tempted to walk the red carpet of victimhood so often unrolled at my feet. For a split second, I even wonder if it isn’t deserved, and this scares me. I feel my memories bending to accommodate the world.

I think Skaskiw’s comments actually speak well of The Hurt Locker, a film less interested in victimhood than thrill-seeking. But the vast majority of public analysis does conform to this dubious hierarchy of moral agency: troops as clueless, blameless servants, politicians as guilt-laden warlords. Granting that the choice to enlist is, in fact, a choice remains taboo. One supports the troops; one claps for them in the airport; one avoids asking questions. Whatever the merits of this kind of mindless, mass absolution, it entails a great a deal of condescension.

Skaskiw is an acquaintance of mine here in Iowa, and I don’t want to belittle his experience by drawing outlandish comparisons he wants nothing to do with. But this is a blog about women, and part of the reason I found his essay so moving is that I recognized its emotional logic in the experience of being told, as a woman, that my choices are not my own. That one engages in sex work because one is damaged or sells ova because one is desperate or sleeps around in sad search of acceptance. You can call this “dehumanizing,” or something, but as Skaskiw recognizes, the danger lies somewhere deeper—in coming, through repetition, to believe in the excuses others think you are owed.

Tags: afghanistan, Iraq, memoir

The Super Bowl E-Trade commercial went as follows: Two babies are video-chatting on their computers and the baby girl accusingly asks the baby boy: "That milkaholic Lindsay wasn't over last night?" A few seconds later another female baby pops into the boy's online window and garbles, " Milk-a-what?" Some more words are spoken and somehow this episode becomes an advertisement for a stock brokerage. But even more nonsensical than the ad: Lindsay Lohan is now insisting that the boyfriend-nabbing, milkaholic baby Lindsay is based on her. And she's suing over it. It sounds like an Onion headline sans punchline: "Lindsay Lohan sues E-Trade for $100 million over "milkaholic" Super Bowl commercial."

Lohan's lawyer says: " 'They're using her name as a parody of her life. Why didn't they use the name Susan? This is a subliminal message. Everybody's talking about it and saying it's Lindsay Lohan.' " E-Trade, start penning your thank-you card to Ms. Lohan, because this commercial just finally became funny. Oh, Lindsay, check your hubris, girl.

Tags: commercial, e-trade, lindsay lohan

—Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) says the wording of the House health care reform bill can be changed to keep taxpayer dollars from funding abortions without placing new restrictions on abortion rights. Stupak, who sponsored the proposed amendment to the House bill barring federal subsidies for abortions, accuses pro-choice advocates of making abortion part of the health care debate. [AP]

—Sarah Palin has finally come up with an excuse for her 10th grade note-taking style: Her palm-scribbling is further evidence of her divinity, or perhaps God's Palinity. At the Ohio Right to Life fundraiser Sunday, she paraphrased Isaiah 49:16, "I wrote your name on the palm of my hand to remember you," and added, "I'm in good company." [Daily Intel, Huffington Post]
Here's a clip from the fundraiser:

—Even Kenneth Starr is chastising Liz Cheney for questioning the "values" of Justice Department lawyers who have represented terror suspects. Starr is one of 19 prominent conservative attorneys to sign a letter protesting Cheney's representation of the Justice lawyers as "the al Qaeda seven." [Salon, Politico]

—Confirmed! Betty White will host Saturday Night Live! But will she mention that Oscar dead-folks montage that didn't mention fellow Golden Girl Bea Arthur? [People, New York Daily News]

Tags: abortion, al qaeda seven, Bart stupak, bea arthur, betty white, health care reform, kenneth starr, liz cheney, Palin, Rape, snl, stupak amendment

Via Feministe comes this disturbing story of a UMass student who was "found responsible for sexual assault" by the university last fall. His accuser, an alumna, did not press criminal charges outside the university's disciplinary system. According to the Boston Globe, the alleged rapist was given a "deferred suspension," which means he was allowed to continue living on campus and will graduate on time.

Late last month, NPR told a depressingly similar story of an Indiana University student named Margeaux who was raped by a classmate. Her parents tried to get local police to investigate the case, but they refused, so Margeaux was forced to seek justice through the school. She ended up in a tribunal with her alleged rapist and his father. Margeaux told NPR of that disastrous tribunal, " '[My accuser] called me a slut. And his dad, who's not supposed to speak, starts talking and saying, 'These college girls have one-night stands all the time.' " Margeaux's alleged rapist was also given a slap on the wrist: a year-long suspension.

As Emily Bazelon suggested on the XX Factor late last year, one reason why sexual assault on campus remains unpunished is because the Clery Act, under which schools are supposed to disclose crimes that occur on campus, conflicts with the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act, which keeps disiplinary records confidential. NPR concurs, noting that offending schools have only been fined by the Department of Education six times in 20 years for violating the Clery Act. NPR also notes that Russlynn Ali, the Education Department's assistant secretary for civil rights, is "willing to take steps not used by her predecessors: to withdraw federal funding from offending schools and refer cases to the Department of Justice for possible prosecution." At least it's a small step in the right direction, but it probably won't offer much solace to Margeaux or her UMass counterpart.

Tags: clery act, NPR, Rape, rape on campus, sexual assault, umass amherst